The Rise Of The Rednecks!

Posted by Simple Dude | Posted in Stupid People, TV | Posted on 24-10-2012

Do you watch that show The Soup on the E! channel?  I don’t catch the show every week, but when I do it makes me think the writers have some of the best jobs in the world.

If you haven’t seen it, the formula is basic.  They show clips of reality shows, then make fun of them.  And if you have ever watched a reality show, you know it’s pretty damn easy to make fun of the people who show up in those twisted versions of reality.  Could you imagine being a writer there…  you come to work, watch crappy reality shows and write jokes about the idiocy featured on those shows.  The jokes mostly write themselves.

This past week The Soup highlighted a segment of reality show that has taken over cable TV lately… Redneck Shows.  There are DOZENS of them right now. Why the hell are rednecks so entertaining?  People like me who grew up in the north have always viewed these people as backwoods, mouth breathing, gun rack toting, tooth missing, cousin-marrying hilljacks.  I know all rednecks don’t fit that description…  just 90% of them.

There is Hillbilly Hand Fishing, where they literally stick their hands into an underwater hole with the hopes of grabbing onto a hiding, angry catfish.  Do they get bit?  Hell yes.  Do they always get a fish?  Hell no.  Is it the dumbest thing on TV?  Damn near… keep reading.

“Hey baby.. come on over and stick yer hand in this here hole.”

Then there is a show called Swamp People:

“Who wants to tickle my gator?”

On this show a bunch of backwards overall wearing hillbillys go around shooting alligators.  I’m not sure why.  Maybe the gators stole their Lynyrd Skynyrd Greatest Hits cassette tape.

Side note:  I actually like Lynyrd Skynyrd.

This next one is unique.. it’s about a hillbilly family who actually became millionaires by selling duck callers.  It’s called Duck Dynasty:

All that money, yet not one of them can afford a decent razor.

I haven’t really seen much of that show show…  but it reminds me of a bad ZZ Top tribute band.

The king of redneck shows these days is something called Here Comes Honey Boo Boo:

These people make more money than you do.

This show is awful.  I attempted to watch it once and couldn’t get through it.  It’s a shame people like this continue to procreate.  The Soup refers to the mom on this show as the Human Thumb.  Which I have to admit, is pretty funny.

I can’t say why these hillbilly shows have taken over cable TV lately.  Maybe watching these people makes us feel better about our lives…  though in truth, thanks to these shows, most of these people make a hell of a lot more money than I do.

Although I am sure they’ll blow all that cash on cases of Milwaukee’s Best beer, tins of Skoal and red, white and blue bandanas.

SD

 

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