25
Going Down Under
Posted by Simple Dude | Posted in Uncategorized | Posted on 25-01-2011
Last Friday I got out of work early so was home mid afternoon. I’ve commented many times in the past about how lousy daytime TV is and I’m sure you’d all agree. So in flipping around I stopped on Oprah. I have watched Oprah a handful of times over the last six months or so, if I’m home sick or whatever. Don’t judge me – up against all the other shit on at that time, her show isn’t that bad. Would I watch it at 9:00pm? Hell no. At 4:00pm? Yeah, maybe.
So last Friday she was showing highlights from some shows she did in the last year Down Under. You know, in Australia. This is pretty ironic. I have never been Down Under myself. I’ve been back there, over yonder, upstairs, this way, that way, right here and left out. But never Down Under. At least until now!
Technically, no… I am physically still here in Minnesota. The icebox of the U.S. But virtually? I’m Down Under RIGHT NOW where it’s the middle of summer. I’m specifically at Dribble, the blog run by my favorite Aussie, Mynx. I took over her joint today with a guest post. The subject I chose to write about is one of my least favorite things to do in this whole freakin’ messed up world. No, it had nothing to do with leg shaving or face shaving.
Go check it out – and while you’re there browse around and check out her other posts. Mynx won’t mind, she’s cool like that. She is in the process of a move right now so she’s been hosting some guest posts and re-posting some of her own older stuff too.
I’ll be back in the next day or two with some non-stop nonsense and flippin-hilarity. Well, at least I’ll laugh – and amusing myself has always been my number one priority in life! Until then, I’ll leave you with one of my favorite bad jokes:
Two astronauts were sitting around talking and one says “Did you hear they opened a new nightclub on the moon?”The other one replies, “No, I didn’t. How is it?”
“It’s ok. The drinks are real cheap. But it has no atmosphere.”
Yeah, I know it’s bad.. but give me a break, this shits free.
My post about the messed up advice my 20 year old self would give to me 16 year old self brought lots of great comments… led by these:
Falen aka Thundercat832 at Colorful Rants of a Fed Up Sista always leaves great comments, like this one:
“I would defiantly tell my younger self to punch the hell out of Danny Zeo…some jerk in high school that pulled down my pants in front of the whole school! I better not catch that jackass on the street!”
And Bushman at A Simple Life said something that makes me wish I had though of it:
“20 yr old Bushman walks over to 16 yr old Bushman and says see that guy standing over there watching. That’s us at 37. Let’s go see if he’ll buy us some beer. Some things just wouldn’t ever change!”
Happy Australia Day!
SD
Sweet! A shout-out! *catches the holy ghost…does back flips… accidentally hits head on sharp corner of coffee table…bleeds—ruins a good weave* ouch!
Posted on: Jan/25/2011@8:28 pm
Oh Dude, how can I ask you to guest blog for me someday if I know you hate it??
Actually, it might make me want to ask you more… just to see if I can get you to do it…
Hmmm…
http://myjoyproject.blogspot.com/
Posted on: Jan/25/2011@8:29 pm
Nice SD, your in sydney! I have another awful joke for you. My dad is only afraid of one thing in the entire world. No not an empty fridge, Clowns. But he has alot of bad clown jokes.
"Two cannibles are eating a clown and one looks at the other and says 'Does this taste funny to you?'" I love it
http://catiesjourney.blogspot.com
Posted on: Jan/25/2011@8:30 pm
That was a great guest post.
Posted on: Jan/25/2011@8:30 pm
@MyJoyProject – I meant that I hate moving.. not that I hate guest posting. oops.
(runs off to edit the post and re-word that line)
Posted on: Jan/25/2011@8:32 pm
Has it happened to you that TV would be lousy the day (or night) that you are free and have nothing better to do than watch TV?
Posted on: Jan/25/2011@8:50 pm
I left a comment on Dribble and I loved this one too. That was a good post about older self/younger self. Great comments indeed.
Posted on: Jan/25/2011@8:59 pm
I don't want to know why you're worrying about leg shaving. Seriously. WHAT?
Posted on: Jan/25/2011@9:05 pm
that was a great guest post. You do have some great commenters, but it makes me sad that I never win. Oh well, one day I will come up with a great comment and you will kneel to my awesomeness. well maybe not.
amberlashell.com
Posted on: Jan/25/2011@9:09 pm
So I have to say… when I first read the title… I thought it was going to be about a whole other "going down under". Regardless.. awesome post per usual!
Posted on: Jan/25/2011@9:25 pm
I thought the post was about a whole other down under right up until the moment you revealed Australia. Talk about a drastic shift in mental images.
http://zpnotesfromunderground.blogspot.com/
Posted on: Jan/25/2011@10:30 pm
I'm moving in with boyfriend at the end of february… Nervous. I have a lot of stuff too… Los of crap to pack!
Posted on: Jan/25/2011@10:42 pm
Oh, if only every guy was so enthused about going down under!
Posted on: Jan/25/2011@10:56 pm
A french fry walks into a bar and then becomes upset as no one stops to take his order. Finally he yells, "Hey! Can I drink around here?"
The bartender replies, "No I'm sorry, we don't serve food here."
Posted on: Jan/25/2011@11:08 pm
I just thought I should let you know that I saw that Oprah episode too! It was on in the waiting room at a doctor's office and I got called back shortly after seeing Oprah try Vegemite.
Posted on: Jan/25/2011@11:22 pm
I think its very commendable that you're not afraid to get in touch with your feminine side by watching a little Oprah now and then….
Posted on: Jan/25/2011@11:47 pm
I'm a blonde who loves blonde jokes, this is one of my favorites…
Two blonde sisters had promised their Uncle…
…, who had been a seafaring gentleman all his life, to bury him at sea when he died. Of course, in due time, he did pass away and the two blondes kept their promise.
They set off from Clearwater Beach with their uncle all stitched up in a burial bag and loaded onto their rowboat.
After a while Bubbles says, 'Do you think we're out far enough, Barbie?"
Barbie slipped over the side and finding the water only knee deep said, "Nope, not yet Bubbles."
So they row a little farther…. Again Bubbles asks Barbie, "Do you think we're out far enough now?"
Once again Barbie slips over the side and almost immediately says, "No, this will never do. The water is only up to my chest."
So on they row and row and row, and finally Barbie slips over the side and disappears. Quite a bit of time goes by and poor Bubbles is really getting worried when suddenly Barbie breaks the surface, gasping for breath she says, "OK, it's finally deep enough. Hand me the shovel."
Posted on: Jan/26/2011@12:11 am
Everyone should go down under. If Ophra can do it so can you!
Posted on: Jan/26/2011@12:14 am
you did a great job
Posted on: Jan/26/2011@1:33 am
Wait, what?! Ohhhh… after reading the title of the post, I thought I was at Denny's site.
Posted on: Jan/26/2011@2:26 am
interesting. liked the 20 year old talking the the 16 year old. You are right. It's all complete bullsh*t. The only reason I keep rereading To Kill a mockingbird is because it's a completely different book every five years, and Not because the book has changed.
Posted on: Jan/26/2011@4:21 am
SD thanks so much for coming over today. Do you want another beer before you get in the pool. Bloody beautiful day today. So warm, you may need some sunscreen.
Hubby has fired up the barbie and it looks like we have a party happening. Might need another couple of cartons of beer at this rate.
Love meeting all your friends too. Come back sometime. Always got room for mates to crash.
Posted on: Jan/26/2011@4:28 am
Well done. A great guest post. You know, once you guest post on a blog in another country, you become an automatic citizen there.
It's totally a thing. I read it somewhere.
Posted on: Jan/26/2011@4:34 am
Great post! I actually like your "back there, over yonder, upstairs, this way, that way, right here and left out" comment. I might have to use that someday
Since you are up for some jokes, here is one for ya….
A blonde is watching the news, and hears that 2 Brazilian men died in a skydiving accident. She cries and says, "Oh my God, how many is a Brazilian?"
Posted on: Jan/26/2011@7:36 am
Yep, Australia is awesome and thanks to Oprah, now everyone knows it! I am Australian and I got to admit Oprah made it looks so good even I want to go and holiday t/here! Happy Australia Day to me – and all you other Aussies out there.
Posted on: Jan/26/2011@1:56 pm
http://catiesjourney.blogspot.com/2011/01/pardon.html
I'd love to go to Australia, but not because of oprah unfortunatly. I want to thanks to a show i used to watch when i was younger. Loved your guest post on Mynx.
Posted on: Jan/26/2011@2:00 pm
Awesome guest post. I left ya a comment over there.
Posted on: Jan/26/2011@6:21 pm
You have now made me need to go somewhere warm.. Since i also cannot go to australia I guess I'll check out mynx's blog.
If you need somewhere else to chill check out my blog. I just wrote about how violence is an underappreciated problem solving method, and also about how evil pandas are
http://whatwouldjareddo.blogspot.com
check it out!
Posted on: Jan/26/2011@7:35 pm
SD one time I had to move because I spent all of the rent money on weed, beer and pizza. I shoved all of my belongings into my '73 pinto. I hate moving too.
Posted on: Jan/26/2011@10:33 pm