Another From The Simple Dude Vault

Posted by Simple Dude | Posted in Uncategorized | Posted on 26-12-2010

I hope everyone had a great Christmas.  I’m in a bit of a food-overload stupor right now.  I guess it’s sort of a cookie hangover.  Things went well, the Lady Friend and I were both happy with our gifts.  And really that’s all that matters right?  At least to me.  

In typical weekend fashion, I am half-assing it.  But just like Friday this one is a true Half Assed post as i’m pulling another old one from the “vault”.  Since this blog is only about four months old I really don’t have a very big vault to choose from – but I think you’ll like this one, it’s from mid-October, right after I moved in with the Lady Friend.  Not a situation I enjoyed at the time… but I guess it’s good for a laugh, so what the hell.   

Well We’re Moving On Up!

No, not to “The Eaast Siiiide” as The Jefferson’s theme song suggests.  (for those of you too young to know that TV show, your homework assignment is to spend more time watching crappy old TV shows and less time on the net)  But I am all moved into the lady friends place now.  I even made a quick trip down to the old place today to grab a few more random things this afternoon.  Whatever is left can wait, my renters are not moving in for a couple weeks.

The move was ok, maybe a little easier then most since I got rid of so much shit over the last few weeks.  I had a friend helping with some of the heavy stuff and my parents were helped as much as they could, with the lady friend helping to unpack and organize my stuff at her pad.  And with the place as empty as it is I really start to realize what a shitty housekeeper I am.  Little dust bunnies behind dressers, desk, couch, TV, etc.  And my ‘office’ … oh fuck.  What is it about computers that just attract dust?  Disgusting.  I’ve been called a lot of things in my life but neat-freak isn’t one of them.  However I am not a slob either.. I clean on a semi regular basis and try to keep the place looking decent.  But I guess it had been a while since I moved some shit around!  So a damn good cleaning is on the to do list before the renters move in.  Maybe I should hire a service to do that – has anyone had success with one those?
There was a potentially embarrassing moment.  Early Saturday morning while pulling some stuff out of the closet I came across something every single guy (many women too) has, or HAD at some point in their lives.  A box of porn.  This was shit I hadn’t even thought about let alone looked at in many many years.  I didn’t want any of it so I stuffed it into a couple shoe boxes and taped them shut.  I intended to drop it all to the bottom of my garbage can and pile more stuff on top when I left to make a run to the bank.  Then I decided it wouldn’t hurt to keep one DVD…  why not right?  
So I set that aside.  I got distracted by something, and set the whole lot on the stove where it sat literally all day as I was hauling stuff in and out, making a couple trips to the new place.  Towards the end of the day I saw the shoe boxes and extra DVD still sitting in the same spot.  The separate DVD was under the shoe boxes where I left it – my 70 year old mom had been helping me pack up stuff in the kitchen and apparently never saw it.  I grabbed it quickly and ran out to throw it in my car.  Whew – embarrassment averted!   
A little while later I was making a quick pass through the house and saw the separate DVD sitting on a box in the living room.  Apparently in my haste to grab the naughty stuff and get the fuck out of there I dropped the DVD.  One of my parents must have found it and put it on the box.  I stuffed into a bag out of sight, but it was too late – the damage had been done.  They didn’t say anything about it and I sure as hell didn’t either.  Maybe it’ll get brought up at Thanksgiving…  sigh. 
UPDATE:  It was NOT brought up at Thanksgiving, or Christmas.  That would have been some uncomfortable turkey table talk. 

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