Oct
23
This Crown Doesn’t Come With A Throne
Posted by Simple Dude | Posted in Uncategorized | Posted on 23-10-2010
I’ve recently seen a bunch of bloggers sharing their dental experiences. We’ve all had bad things happen in a dentist chair and I can’t imagine anyone who enjoys those visits. Personally i’d rather spend the day trying to eat my own foot then go to the dentist – but when you consider the alternative, having healthy teeth ain’t such a bad thing.. i’m jus’ sayin’.
When I was a kid I took good care of my teeth and didn’t have any cavities at all until I was about 20 years old. But as so often happens when you get into your 20s and can make decisions for yourself I decided “fuck that prick and his white coat” and didn’t go to the dentist for maybe 5 years. When I finally did go I got some bad news… I needed TWO root canals. Ugh. I didn’t know what the hell a root canal was but it didn’t sound good. If you are not in the know, it means the tooth is a lost cause.. so they have to “kill” it by eliminating the nerve ending. No fun. So then you need to get a fake crown to replace the one they wipe out. This part isn’t such a bad thing…a crown will never get a cavity, it will never get get coffee or nicotine stains and it looks just like the real deal.
So over the course of three appointments I had the root canals, was molded for new crowns and then had the permanent fake teeth installed. One of them is way in the back of my mouth so I had my mouth stretched open like a fuckin’ baby bird for about an hour each time I was in ‘the chair’ but the other one was just to the right of my two front teeth on top. So that wasn’t as bad since the dentist and his minions didn’t have to have their latex hands down my throat to get at it. When all was said and done my insurance only covered about half the work, leaving me out of pocket about $800.
Then about a year later I was sitting at work, pretending to keep busy while eating a bagel sandwich. I absentmindedly bit into it and heard a crunch. I thought maybe there was something hard in the bagel I was biting into and decided to spit it out. Nope, it wasn’t the bagel. The crown in the front of my mouth BROKE OFF. Luckily I didn’t swallow it. The good thing is that the tooth was dead (see above) so there was no pain… no feeling at all really. Other then the rising anger towards my damn dentist.
I called them immediately and they said they were pretty busy that day and asked if I could come in tomorrow. “Uhh… NO. I look like a fucking Jerry Springer guest – you’re going to have to squeeze me in today!” Which they did fortunately. They put it back on temporarily then a week later I went back and they reattached it with a little steel post they embedded into my upper jaw. Seriously. It shows up on x-rays. Fortunately not big enough to cause airport trouble and put me on a no-fly list. The dentist actually wanted to charge me for the “repairs”. I wasn’t hearing any of that noise… it was their shitty work that caused it in the first place. Plus they had pulled enough money out of this mouth.
That was probably 10 years ago and since then I’ve had just one cavity – and make regular visits to that bastard sadist and his white coat. Not taking any chances there.
SD
Oh– I've got you beat. Here: http://strandupdate.blogspot.com/2010/01/what-happens-when-you-combine-soccer.html
To this day? None of the numbing stuff works. Nothing. If the pain is too bad without drugs then I have to go to a surgeon and get knocked out. Fun times. At least the drilling isn't bad anymore- I'm pretty much used to that. But digging around? That's no joke. That hurts.
Posted on: Oct/23/2010@11:11 pm
You want to hear a dental story? short version: perfect teeth to the point of no cavities, no braces nothing till now, I recently went for my first check up in three years (pure procrastination and laziness) My pregnancy brought on 12 cavities!!!!! I have coverage for 90% but they still wanna charge $1100 for the rest! insane!!!
CBG
canadianbloggergirl.blogspot.com
Posted on: Oct/24/2010@1:03 am
My mother (who was a damn nurse) never took me to a dentist. NEVER. My first trip to one was a year after I left home at age 17 to get my wisdom teeth taken out.
Posted on: Oct/24/2010@1:10 am
I've had a few cavities, nothing major, but I hated the cleaning lady. She would literally rip the metal sharp thing between my teeth and gums and make me bleed and hurt. I have never had braces and my teeth are really close together so ya.
Also the wisdom teeth surgery wasn't so bad, worst part was the swelling afterwards.
http://theadorkableditzmissteps.blogspot.com/
Posted on: Oct/24/2010@1:46 am
I spent my childhood in the freakin dentist's chair. Now I got me some tooth caps along with the crowns, but I had to wait until my insurance hit 100%.
Oh, and the last guy I went to charged me $90 for a lil repair on one of my lower teeth and it came out the next day….friggin loser dentist that he is.
Posted on: Oct/24/2010@3:05 am
Dentists…worse then lawyers I think. 6 root canals…3 surgically removed wisdom teeth…7 cavities…and way too much money later I believe I'm good for awhile thanks.
That last wisdom tooth they 'pulled'? The dentist actually called it a little bastard while kneeling (KNEELING) on the arm of the chair yanking on that tooth as hard as he could before he decided to cut it out.
And that godamn blue rubber dental dam they put in there? Somehow the drill always manages to slip off/out of a tooth and gets bound up in the rubber and gets sucked into my lips. Bloody fat lip & the drool….sexy mama there.
Ya…real fun dentists are.
Posted on: Oct/24/2010@6:57 am
I have had two wisdom teeth out, but it wasn't all that bad,, I had some fillings when I was little, but don't really remember it all that much.
Posted on: Oct/24/2010@11:58 am
I've had one root canal and both lower wisdom teeth removed. My fondest dental memory is of the dentist cautioning me to watch out for the adjustable spotlight they shine down from above. Some hinge recently broke & part of it could, without warning, FALL OFF. IT WAS HELD UP BY STICKY TAPE!!! And conveniently situated right over my head.
Posted on: Oct/24/2010@12:16 pm
Holy crap in Australia I read every day in the papers about months and months long waiting lists to see dentists because they're aren't enough to go around. I've spent about $9k in my 30 years of life with my teeth and I ain't ABOUT to start looking British-uh, Australian! At least you didn't go the ghetto route and use super glue. That would definitely put you in Springer territory. Hed hed down under
Posted on: Oct/24/2010@2:53 pm
I had all 4 wisdom teeth removed, surgically of course, at once. When I wake up, he tells me one of the wisdom teeth was "attached to the bone in an odd way" and they had missed it on the x-rays, so they had to use something to sand down the bone to remove it. I ate soup for 4 weeks, had pain where that tooth had been for almost 8 weeks. Worst part of all, the stupid things had never even bothered me, he just kept insisting they needed to come out. I still wonder if I could have left them in.
Posted on: Oct/24/2010@3:49 pm
Dentist = evil.
4 wisdom teeth and 3 weeks of chipmunky-suffering, WITH percocet.
Worse than that? Me and my charming good looks and dildo-weilding prowess managed to bite down on a fork in such a way that half of both front teeth snapped off in a hurry.
I remember having to wait two days to get in to the dentist, in pain, looking like I belonged in a trailer on blocks somewhere in overalls.
And that dentist still called the needle his 'magic wand' until I was 15 and changed dentists. Effing a-hole.
Posted on: Oct/24/2010@6:10 pm